Back in Montreal - Indian Summer

I think I brought a bit of Greece back to Montreal, as it is Indian Summer for the second time! The colours of the trees have started to change.  I hope to paint at least one watercolour of this annual splendour before Winter takes over with its ferocious cold and obscures all colours.....Later today:  Three leaves tap-danced accross the street.  I counted them.  They danced in the wind which announced the end of  Summer, I'm afraid. Maybe it will still be warm tomorrow?
Today, a box of my pastels fell on the floor in the studio.  I did my best to recover them and use their colours on various papers, by pressing the papers to the floor.  There were some interesting images formed, but nothing too remarkable. Mostly, they can be backgrounds, just as the Universe is a background for us.
My thoughts are for free as all things should be.  The hounds of capitalism want to charge for everything.  Can they sell emotion?  Everyone wants happiness, not depression, even though it is a most human emotion.  The idea of Happiness is is expensive because its' secret has not been divulged.
I was happy the day that I drew portraits of the children that I met in a field in Serbia, and the day when I drew a classmate's imaginary future husband in high-school.  Art is for all, but not all can create.  That is a fine line which critics are constantly vying to define. Does art by an adult resembling a child's qualify as art or does a child's art qualify?  The best art is through honesty.  The passage is through thorns. Just like in the ancient fairy tales.
There is a lot if writing here.  Now I understand how to write a blog.  One must be alone and have time.  It is like writing in a diary with the possibility of being read by others. There are no secrets even though it feels secret, as though you are all alone.  I must say that I admire those trying to
protect our privacy. Will they be able to evade the hordes of clean-cut, clear-eyed technocrats?  They search the airports, the airwaves, the websites, the e-mails and probably the blogs.
There is so much more to write, and so much more to paint.
This whole time, an ideal of truth is trying to present itself; no matter by whom or by which means, it
wants to be seen.
Truth is the consort of accountability and consequence, therefore truth is always in fear.  Only the
fearless know truth, and those are few.  This is the rumination of an ordinary person who tries to make sense through colour, line, shapes and ideas.
Truth appeared to me most convincingly, years ago, on Hollyburn mountain!  It was a self-explanatory state of awareness and freedom.  It can probably be scientifically explained by oxygen levels in the brain and so forth. It took a lot of climbing to get there.

July Portrait

The portrait of M is finished for now.  I am not 100 % satisfied, because the expression of the face does not convey the playful side of him.  It is very serious and dignified.  Maybe those are his predominant characteristics?  But the playfulness is presented by the colours....so I guess that is where the secret lies, in the colours!  I used Matisse-like colours for the portrait, all because M said he wanted a red background and, of course, that calls for strong expressionistic colours as a compliment!  I first painted in a pure red background and worked on top of that.  It is too bad I don't know how to import photos to show the portrait, but it turned out well.  I used predominantly palette knives and the painting is quite three-dimensional, even though the background is one colour!

The portrait was begun about a year ago and it is now ready. But you never know with portraits.  Perhaps M will want a change?  I will see.  Some people are very happy with their portraits, while very few are not.  Maybe I see something they don't wish to acknowledge, or I simply capture a moment they don't recognize.  There are so many emotions that pass through our minds and thoughts.  The secret is to paint the essence of the person.  So I think that the dignity in this portrait is definitely M's essence.

What is next?  The sun is illuminating the Cedars, moving ever so quickly.  Now, only the tips are in light!  Beauty of illumination.....beauty of the wind....beauty of July.

Possible, impossible

I just realized how much everything depends on the moment.  We cannot influence anything, no matter how hard we try.  I think the Buddhists understand that.  Maybe other religions and philosophies as well.  Even politicians and spies can't learn from previous events, so how can we?  If anyone has a chance, they should go to the first Church or open green field and pray.  Who will be heard first?  It feels so strange, to be writing of green fields in the middle of the night.  But that is an artist's domain....to always think of other scenarios...remember the dark when there is light...reminisce about snow in the summer.  It's not necessary that everything is opposite, black or white...it can just be a single letter, a breath, a stumble, a sound, which transport us back or forward to what has been or what will be....
At this point, I would like to add a photo, but will have to find a way to import my latest work in a direct way.  Technical hurdle, again.  Imagine a photo here...green upon green, with star-like splashes, spiralling towards an ultramarine nebula!
Today, I learned a few things, some old some new.  One is that I don't remember some of the most beautiful moments of life, another; that tomorrow is the first day of Summer even though it almost feels over. I also realized that I have secretly been an abstract painter for most of the time.  Though that's not something I learned, but something I realized. Learning and realizing are definitely not the same thing.  So much is learned before it is realized.  My abstract paintings are just beginnings, musings, secretive plays and fanciful expressions.  Most of them end up with visions and visitors of human shapes, but some refuse entry or change, remaining enigmatic renderings of imprints and strokes of colour.
Another thing I learned is that more that 1,000 people have seen this blog!  I wonder if any ever read it?
I still prefer painting from live models.  Their destinies are often entwined with the paintings.  I learned today, that my impressions are often idealized even though I prize myself as being an astute judge of character.  No one can really know how these changes occur.  S will move on to another country, taking her painting with her, without really knowing why. I am sad to see it go, more than the actual person.  The best of her is in the painting.  It will never change.  Time's tarnish of a painting is external, while of a person it is internal...but that is for another time.  The east is going to sleep.

Artistic May in Montreal

Somehow I completely missed April in this blog...of course it's not the only month I missed!  But it was an important month for my artistic evolution and expression!  It is the month in which I created my large abstract diptych, "Hermes' wings", which everyone loves!  It is also the month in which the "jump" or "wind" painting began! April was a busy creative month despite the cold weather and physical difficulties I had.  But May is full of obligations, clutter and tension.  The heat began yesterday, all of a sudden, as though a Cuban wave followed us all the way from Varadero. But it's not Cuba.....it's asphalty, pot-holed, dusty Montreal. It's only in the last few days that tulips have come out and leaves are starting to bud on the bare tree branches!  Hopefully it will all be green within a week! Nature has a lot of artistry to do very quickly!  I just realised that today is Mother's day....
Another time, another day,
My Mother, so far away!
Now I will try to download the studio photo with the new paintings by Marina!

This was the studio at the end of April...the freedom caught in motion.....temporary flight anticipating happiness!

Marchness

I always thought that March Madness had to do with how crazy and mad everyone here becomes after such a long winter but no, it has to do with the March Hare's mating season and then the term was transferred onto basketball! Well I for one, think it is an appropriate term for Montrealers in March!  We are all a bit mad...spring is here, but it isn't.  And it won't really come till May.  We want to go out and celebrate, shed our winter jackets, gloves and hats, run in the parks!, but no it's still freezing and the snow hasn't melted...need I go on?  So I will not be going out to paint any watercolours soon.  The studio gives the semblance of spring with all the plants and streaming sunshine!  If I close my eyes, it almost feels tropical!  I will concentrate my madness at cleaning up and arranging all the paintings after the Ottawa show.  It went very well and there was a great vibe before during and after, despite the physical difficulties of putting on such a big show! These days so much falls on the artists shoulders...we have to be the creators, the transporters, the publicists,the merchants.....it goes on! K had a dream that a museum offered to sponsor a show for me:)

King Midas and Tsar Novinar were my big collectors for this show.  The articles that came out were wonderful, especially by the lovely S.  I had a lot if good comments regarding the press and especially the painting of the Carica.  Who would ever guess that I would paint a Serbian Tsarina, but inspiration is a strange bird...it travels the ages!

February update

I have been working hard for my upcoming expo in Ottawa for Women's Day 2014!  I worked a lot on the Serbian Tsarina and she is now finished, except for the final varnish!  It was not just the act of painting which took place.....it is a melange of history, emotion, logic, colour, poetry and composition.

The other  portrait that I finished is of M.S.C.!  It shows her extreme generosity and kindness, but I think it also captures her logical and analytical side, as well as her womanliness!  It is only a drawing, but it has a lot of personality!  Sometimes we can say more with one line than with many colours!

This exhibit is important, because I'm gathering some of  my paintings of women over time, and will let them say something!  It's as though the paintings paint themselves over the years and always know what they mean.  They only wait to be called out (shown) at the right time.  There are still more waiting, like actors in the wings.  Men, women, children...all waiting their turn, the right time to tell their story.